kira.jane
New member
Posts: 3
This has been a difficult season of life. December I moved over a thousand miles away from my husband to take a job. I know lots of wives would enjoy this time alone but we are each other's second marriage and we are that rare couple who is obnoxiously in love and so lucky to have found each other, so being without my husband is sorta a big deal. I miss him so bad somedays I can't breathe. I've not been in his arms since December 27, 2025. I told him recently that I was stupid for doing this and it was so hard. He responded in the best way he does, "If you weren't struggling from us being apart then we weren't meant to be". I know I am incredibly lucky to have someone I genuinely miss so deeply who also misses me.
It just sucks to be somewhere new without the other half of your identity. We are definitely not enmeshed and have a healthy sense of our individuality, however, it definitely makes being new to a community a lot louder. Who wants to go try the local restaurants always answer the hostess, yes a table for 1. I have ebb and flowed in and out of depression since moving, some days I just count down until bed, some days I spend to much time out at stores reaching for human interaction spending money I don't want to spend and then there's door dash.... Moving from a remote rural community to a fairly urban center is a big culture shock and some indulgence has definitely been occurring.
Then there's my body....medication changes, gaps in medical care due to move, routine disruption, eating with my heart and not my head and long standing chronic issues with liking my body. My husband's go to when he is struggling is to turn to sports and movement, he grew up that way and is truly and athlete in every sense of the word. Well....instead I grew up with yo-yo diets, late night kraft mac and cheese when sad and not enough movement. He's gotten healthier and I've strayed from health goals. I've watched the scale go up and down, my rosacea out of control, my Achilles hurts constantly (I had a complete tear July 2025) and a general dislike for how I look.
If you're curious YES he is coming to see me soon and will be moving here by the middle of summer at latest. But in the mean time I just feel paralyzed by these things. I have some days that are better than others and some that just feel insufferable. I feel so incredibly alone facing these things and yet at the same time I know I'm not. I've been in the shadows for a long time on here and decided to dive in a share some of what is happening in my life. I do not have a lot of outlets or relationships to share about me.
If you read this thank you, I hope we all find what we are looking for or what we need.
It just sucks to be somewhere new without the other half of your identity. We are definitely not enmeshed and have a healthy sense of our individuality, however, it definitely makes being new to a community a lot louder. Who wants to go try the local restaurants always answer the hostess, yes a table for 1. I have ebb and flowed in and out of depression since moving, some days I just count down until bed, some days I spend to much time out at stores reaching for human interaction spending money I don't want to spend and then there's door dash.... Moving from a remote rural community to a fairly urban center is a big culture shock and some indulgence has definitely been occurring.
Then there's my body....medication changes, gaps in medical care due to move, routine disruption, eating with my heart and not my head and long standing chronic issues with liking my body. My husband's go to when he is struggling is to turn to sports and movement, he grew up that way and is truly and athlete in every sense of the word. Well....instead I grew up with yo-yo diets, late night kraft mac and cheese when sad and not enough movement. He's gotten healthier and I've strayed from health goals. I've watched the scale go up and down, my rosacea out of control, my Achilles hurts constantly (I had a complete tear July 2025) and a general dislike for how I look.
If you're curious YES he is coming to see me soon and will be moving here by the middle of summer at latest. But in the mean time I just feel paralyzed by these things. I have some days that are better than others and some that just feel insufferable. I feel so incredibly alone facing these things and yet at the same time I know I'm not. I've been in the shadows for a long time on here and decided to dive in a share some of what is happening in my life. I do not have a lot of outlets or relationships to share about me.
If you read this thank you, I hope we all find what we are looking for or what we need.
