The Journey Continues

kandy

Member
Honeybee Posts: 16
Hi everyone,

I am reestablishing this thread because my old account seems to be deleted...

Those who know me know I have an alcohol addiction, and honestly I relapsed. The withdrawal has become worse, and the dynamics between drinking and trying not to drink has become more dramatic.

I reached out to a treatment center under my friend's influence. Not sure how things will go, though.

I worked out today, mostly stretching and walking. I was tired all the time and my attention span was low. My cardiovascular was weakee than ever. When I try to stay sharp and concentrating it doesn't last very long.

I will keep things updated. One thing I would really like to achieve is the 5k, and than under 25mins. Another thing is those really cool movements like pull up, hand stand, planche, L sit, etc.
 

GentleOx

Well-known member
Warrior from Hong Kong
Posts: 125
I'm sorry to hear about your relapse. Withdrawals are an absolute nightmare to go through. I've gone to work and sat through lectures while going through withdrawal and they were absolutely punishing. If you can at all, take it easy, rest up, and drink lots of liquids with electrolytes. Exercise will get easier over time.

Take it one day at a time, and you'll be alright! And welcome for your new thread.
 

Fremen

Well-known member
Mercenary from Italy
Posts: 524
"“Keep an eye on the staircases. They like to change.” Percy Weasley, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone."
Welcome to the New Hive :)
:love:
 

kandy

Member
Honeybee Posts: 16
Wow Darebee created badges for all their Challenges. I clicked a couple ones that I completed in the past but for the most part I would like to start it all over. But I am really curious just how the badges look like. It certainly motivates me.

I started the Deadhang Challenge yesterday. 10 secs wasn't as hard as I thought, but the top of my feet was touching another bar. That probably made it easier. Not intentionally going easy but it made me feel safe.
 

kandy

Member
Honeybee Posts: 16
Dead Hang, day 2, 20 secs straight! :cool: I raised my legs up a bit to get totally suspended for most of the time. ;)
20+ mins walk
Bunch of stretches:
- Calf, 5 secs up 5 secs down, 2 sets of 10; static, 2 sets of 30 secs each side
- Single deadlifts 5-sec holds, 2 sets of 10 each side
- Glutes stretches, 3 sets of 10 (left), 2 sets (right)
- others
---
I don't think I have ever done a 20-sec hang, but I am lighter than before, too.
And gradually getting back to my previous routine.

I don't have much idea about the new Hive. Kinda wish the old feature of showing the badges underneath your avatar to be back. But it's a bit nagging, too, when many of us have so many badges that each post can take up so much space unnecessarily. I know it's just the internet and doesn't matter but, still.
 
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mavie

Well-known member
from germany
Pronouns: she/her
Posts: 186
:hi: welcome back. I've missed you and i'm glad you are looking for treatment. You've been on a good way and i hope you find back on that track. Good luck.
 

kandy

Member
Honeybee Posts: 16
It was raining yesterday so I did some stretches only. @mavie Thanks!

It's raining today, too. I hate the rain. It prevents me from doing most of the active stuff I plan to do.

This afternoon when I got up I did my two mobility exercise routine:
Ankle mobility, 3x10 right, 1x10 left.
Glute stretch, 3x10 left, 2x10 right.
Also a couple other home stretches. Maybe that's all. It's my 3rd day doing the ankle mobility, stubborn forever, but let's keep it up until I make it. ;)
 

kandy

Member
Honeybee Posts: 16
@NancyTree thanks for finding the link! Great to see you. I got back the date when I started that more successful attempt. ;)

It can go downhill really quick once you stop fighting it. I basically stopped my resistance at the beginning of Nov. The fatigue, or things in general, is going worse, with or without alcohol. I was too tired to even drink last night. Withdrawal happens earlier, too, and so on, so it isn't even that helpful anymore. Recently the alcohol starts giving me stomach pain, too, besides a few other side effects. I don't know how some people get themselves to a much worse physical situations. The withdrawal or something else must have gone really bad for them to become so.

Not sure if I will not drink tonight. I am still wary of the faint last time, which happened after midnight of my 2nd no alcohol day.

I am expecting some kind of medical treatment this week.
 
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kandy

Member
Honeybee Posts: 16
@NancyTree I just started my drink as I read your post. It's not even midnight yet but if I remembered it right the faint happened somewhere between 48 to 50 hours after my last first sip of beer. It's been about 49 hours till now as I started drinking. I didn't really feel anything unusual, and I admitted that I wanted to drink, but fear definitely played a role. I was quite anxious during the last hour. Part of me wanted to take that risk.

Who knows? It might not be 50 hours this time, but how about 51, 52, etc.? It's totally unpredictable, and the only thing I can rely on is my previous experience. I know how my recent drinking has been as heavy as the time that led to the faint, if not heavier. I am also experiencing many symptoms that I haven't before. I am not an expert in illness but this addiction has been the most unpredictable and frightening disease so far in my life, if I am allowed to say that it's a disease without feeling bad, in terms of the symptoms and the consequences of stopping. It's not always uncomfortable but can get pretty strange and you have zero understanding of what's even going on. All these can make it quite panicking which ultimately curbs me into picking up a booze.

I have definitely walked more than 15 mins today to qualify the daily walk challenge. Been on my feet for 30+ during the 49th hour, lol, besides other walking during the day.

Daily Walk, day 7
 
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mavie

Well-known member
from germany
Pronouns: she/her
Posts: 186
I don't know how some people get themselves to a much worse physical situations.
Truth is: Exactly the same way you got to your current situation. Excuses and postponing the moment to do something about it.
Please take care of yourself and get some professional help with the withdrawal. The symptoms can be treated well but can become dangerous if not. I understand you are taking steps towards treatment and i wish you courage, strength and good luck.
:hug:
 

kandy

Member
Honeybee Posts: 16
@mavie but you can get things like stomach pain. It's hard to understand or even believe when you see on the internet things like alcoholics throwing up blood. Maybe I am just not that tolerant but the stomach pain is enough for me to stop more frequently or drink less. I went to the center today. It's a public/ nonprofit institution, so the procedure wouldn't go fast like you would want it to... Therefore we are still going with the tapering route, but we get better strategy so I believe it will go better this time.

Thanks for the hug. :)
 

kandy

Member
Honeybee Posts: 16
Dead Hang, day 6, 30 secs
Daily Walk, day 8, 15 mins
Standing Mobility, with EC
15 mins stationary bike, easy ride
3x10 reverse lunges, each side
A couple single leg deadlifts

Mobility/flexibility routine:
- Ankle work, 3x10 right, 1x10 left
- Straight knee calf stretches, 3x30 secs each side
---
Quite a lot exercises today. Just got back to some of the mobility stuff, taking it easy. I couldn't run without knee pain and I knew how my quads were weak, so I hopped onto a stationary bike. Slow, low resistance, nothing crazy, but better than nothing. My leg still got tired. :)

The ankle mobility exercise is working. I was pretty much doing just the right side and recently my right leg is able to bend forward without the knee moving in or out when I get off the bus (the high stair steps), but my left knee can't. I always think my left ankle is more mobile. Guess I am wrong~
 
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kandy

Member
Honeybee Posts: 16
I was happy with the 30 secs dead hang today. Even tried doing a pull-up, and not surprisingly I couldn't make it but I was getting higher than I expected. Weight probably played a more important role when your muscles weren't strong, if not weaker than before.

When I tried to use only the quads of my front leg to get up from the lunge position, I was stuck and couldn't move. It felt like that moment when you were not allowed to jerk a sit up and you failed. I think I am going to work on quad strength until I can do that, which is just basic functioning. Even then it will be a nice achievement. Meanwhile keep working on the ankle and some stationary bike.
 
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kandy

Member
Honeybee Posts: 16
Dead Hang, day 7
Daily Walk, day 9
Easy Core, day 3

Mobility/flexibility routine:
- Ankle work, 3x10 right, 1x10 left
- Straight knee calf stretches, 1x10 dynamics each side, 2x30 secs each side
- Single-leg deadlifts, 3x10 holds each side, plus hamstrings and glutes stretches on the left side

Weight:
- One arm bent over rows, 20lbs, 8, 8, 4 each side, plus 1x8 with 10lbs
- Modified shoulder press, 10 lbs, 2x5 each side I think, then another set of 5 with light weight


Pull-up curious:
A few inverted rows
Attempted flex Hang and negative pull-ups
---
I woke up at around 6 am, not what I wanted, just messed up by my drinking. Ended up scrolling my phone and looking up pull-up related stuff in bed. I had a little aspiration toward this cool and challenging exercise.

If I can do one arm bent over rows with 50lbs, which is about half my bodyweight, then I should be able to do a pull-up. I know it's not that simple and I don't have that much weight available anyway, but it should still help. That's why I did the one arm row today, also a modified form of the shoulder press, even a couple deadlifts with a black band. My back was a bit tired and sore to start with probably because of the pull-up attempt yesterday, more so after the rows today.

Later on I tried the flex hang and negative at the outdoor playground. Couldn't do it on a regular bar, but I managed to do a tiny teeny bit on the column of bars where people rest their legs on to stretch their hamstrings. My body leaned on the bars so it's like assisted. The negative was easier than the flex hang since I didn't have to hold it that long.

I don't understand how the earth someone can without assistance just transfer from the dead hang to the flex hang, which involves a larger muscle group, but it seems to be what Darebee and some of the sources recommend people to do. Can't even hold 0.1 sec if I try it on a regular bar.

I am curious about what you fellow bees think on all these. ;)
 
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kandy

Member
Honeybee Posts: 16
Dead Hang, day 9
Daily Walk, day 11, 15+ mins walk
22 mins stationary bike, 10km, easy ride

Mobility/flexibility routine:
- Ankle work, 2x10 right
- Straight knee calf stretches, 1x10 dynamics and 2x30secs static each side
- Glutes, 3x10 left, 2x10 right
- Additional:
Hamstrings stretch, 3 sets of 30 secs each side, with 1 set being aggressive
Butterfly stretch, 3x30 secs
---
Does stationary bike really burn that much calories? It says 272 after riding 22 mins easy, and the pulse, too. Sometimes it says 190 or more and I barely feel much.
 
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NancyTree

Well-known member
Valkyrie from The Netherlands
Posts: 424
"First day of current streak: 26 Mar 2022"
Calculating burned calories is always very unprecise, because many factors are involved and it'svery personal. If it measures a pulse of 190, I can imagine it calculates more calories because then you are paying a lot of effort to ride. 190 seems a bit much for what you describe, I think you should be totally out of breath with that pulse.. does it use those hand irons on the 'handbar'? A separate heart rate strap is most trustworthy. So I'd say: don't judge your exercise on those numbers, cycling 20 minutes is on itself really good 😊
 
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